5 Movie Disasters Solar Panels Could’ve Prevented
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If you’ve read info on solar panels, you know they don’t just have practical application in the real world. They have practical application in the goofiest, scariest, and most otherworldly films of which we can possibly think..
So, without further ado, here are the top five movie disasters that solar panels could’ve prevented not just in the films themselves, but also in the real world.
5. Zoolander: If He Had Info on Solar Panels, He Could’ve Saved His Buddies
Was it the most over-quoted film at the turn of the 21st century? Yes. Does it feel a little outdated now? Absolutely. Do we feel Will Ferrell’s role in the film pales in comparison to his other on-screen bravuras? No doubt.
However, one cannot deny the enduring impact Zoolander and his model buddies had on how we view gas stations, cigarettes, orange mocha frappuccinos, and brightly colored, skintight leather pants.
Big deal. Where can I find some info on solar panels in this equation, you ask?
Well, let’s assume Zoolander and his model buddies left their condo that morning in a smart car electrically powered by solar panels atop the garage roof in which that awesome Jeep was usually parked. Would they have stopped at a gas station that morning to fill up while they were smoking their cigarettes and sousing each other in unleaded fuel?
They would’ve whirred on by, orange mocha frappuccinos in hand, smoldering down the road and into the glorious sunset.
However, one should note there’s a certain level of stupidity that solar energy’s benefits will never be able to overthrow, and these vapid models likely would’ve had the opportunity to meet their maker sooner rather than later if they had been transported into the real world, courtesy of natural selection.
4. 127 Hours Could’ve Been 27 Hours: Cutting Through Battery Loss…and Other Stuff
Aron Ralston did something most human beings would never have the courage to do: After falling down a crevice while hiking/bike riding in southern Utah, he had pinned his arm beneath a several hundred-pound boulder he could not find a way to move.
After 127 hours with his arm ensconced between the rock and the cavern wall, Ralston cut off his own arm with a dull knife he had used to chip away at the boulder 100 hours earlier, hoping it would budge the rock loose, but to no avail.
During Ralston’s sojourn in the cavern, he had a number of small devices with him that could’ve lasted longer had he brought a small, solar-powered charger with him, like a Goal Zero Venture 70 Re-charger.
Although these recharging tools can feed energy input into other devices, they can also save those who use them money on energy — if they acquire said energy from a solar panel itself. These tools are popular for campers and hikers who set out on adventures much like Ralston’s and want to power devices like phones and tablets while journeying in the wilderness.
If Ralston had a fully charged recharger at his disposal, he may have been able to use the battery power and light necessary to power several of his small devices, realize the severity of his predicament, make the decision to cut off his arm a bit quicker and, therefore, perhaps less injurious on both a psychological and physical level.
If Aaron Ralston had left his house that day with a Goal Zero Venture 70 Recharger (which can be charged to full life with a single solar panel), he would’ve had the bandwidth to perhaps power his camera longer, use his headlamp more effectively, etc.
One thing is clear, however: that guy’s got guts.
3. Meet the Parents Rooftop Scene: Greg Focker Needs a Bit More Info on Solar Panels
If you haven’t seen Meet the Parents, you’ve surely heard of the scene where Greg climbs on the roof of his in-laws’ home on the verge of a nervous breakdown and decides to light up to, “Take the edge off.” But the only edge he ended up taking off was the gutter on the roof in question.
How could this debacle have occurred on a rooftop covered in solar panels? They’re too slippery to sit on. And if he doesn’t sit down to smoke on the roof, he doesn’t set the house on fire.
One also doesn’t just chuck a half-lit cigarette away while on top of a roof with a solar module installed. Common sense would tell you that wouldn’t jive too well with the electrical makeup of the system — or anything else in the universe, for that matter.
If you ever find yourself at your in-laws’ house, sitting on top of the roof just so you can relax by inhaling tar, cadmium, and battery acid (sounds REALLY relaxing), you’ll probably think twice about doing it with a pair of environmentally friendly solar panels plopped right next to you.
And when Mr. Focker set the over-lacquered wedding altar on fire, we’re pretty sure a set of skilled solar technicians could’ve created an electrical infrastructure much safer than that.
2. I Am Legend: Overcoming the Apocalypse With Solar Panels
Would you want to leave your domicile if bloodthirsty zombies wanted you dead, or would you go into emergency preparedness mode, which solar panels can facilitate?
You probably would not leave your shelter and you would most likely go into emergency preparedness mode. That’s where the double whammy of solar panels and battery backup would do you wonders.
Sure, with nearly everyone on the planet dead, there isn’t as much of an incentive to reduce one’s carbon footprint, live with a greater degree of environmental consciousness, or save money. You got us there.
There is, however, a much higher demand to become and stay self-sufficient, and there’s no better way to achieve these energy feats than with solar panels for your home, or in Mr. Smith’s case, any home he sees fit.
Although an iconic film about the road we could be heading down, global warming and the “tragedy of the commons” Aristotle warned us about several thousand years prior may lead us to a wasteland resembling the one in which Will Smith fought evil forces in this film, hopefully minus the bloodthirsty zombies.
If everyone had solar, the battery backup could last them much longer than a shut down coal-generating plant, keeping the zombies at bay and giving humankind the resources it needs to bide its time effectively.
1. Combating the Perfect Storm With Solar Generators and Equipment
The millennium stirred with the release of “The Perfect Storm,” which demonstrated what happens when three unimaginably terrifying hurricanes collide in the middle of one of the world’s deadliest seas.
Although the plot focuses on the crew at sea, what happens inland and in real life during situations like these is where solar panels could’ve kicked in to save the day.
For instance, solar-powered communities could’ve saved Florida residents from Hurricane Irma. When this incident occurred, Floridians frantically tried to fill up their gas tanks to skip town, and the demand for gas was so overwhelming that it could not be fulfilled for all those who needed gas to begin driving and skip town.
Had everyone in the locations affected driven electric vehicles and charged them each night with solar panels on their rooftops, people would’ve been able to skip town with their belongings, and without getting in anybody else’s way.
Problem solved, solar panels provided, as usual.